Generals ain’t easy to love and they’re harder to
hold
They care more about the next battle than diamonds or gold
DeathStar destroyers and Amazon Heroes
And Dora Milaje are proof
You may not understand her, an’ she might die young
But she’ll shake the world to it’s roof.
Mamas, raise all your princesses up to be Generals
Instruct them in tactics and honor and pride
How to stand fast when they’re on the right side.
Mamas raise all your princesses up to be Generals
‘Cos they’ll take on the world and they’ll fight like a girl
To save the ones that they love
Generals take lovers who know that they go where they have to
Where the troops need them, and where the foe gathers to fight
Empires tremble when they take the field and then Fall in their moment of triumph
Cause they don’t know surrender, and if they retreat
The trap it leads into holds tight
Mamas, raise all your princesses up to be Generals
Instruct them in tactics and honor and pride
How to stand fast when they’re on the right side.
Mamas raise all your princesses up to be Generals
‘Cos they’ll take on the world and they’ll fight like a girl
To save the home that they love
The inspiration for this bit of randomness is threefold: one, the unhealthy obsession that my childhood best friend and I had for the Travolta/Newton-John movie; two, the merging of Jeff Conaway’s career-bookends, “Keneckie” and “Zack Allen”; and three, the sudden auditory hallucination of Ambassador Delenn singing, “Appropriately Devoted to You”. After that, there was no sleep to be had until the whole thing played out. True Greasers will see there’s still a lot of territory to fill in.
The disturbing part is the number of lines that needed little filking…which says a lot about the alienation of teenagers in the 1950’s, if nothing else!
One to Many Mornings, Again
Lyrics: Mark E. Horning Dec, 2017
Music: Bob Dylan, 1963
Down the streets the folks are walkin’ And they’re gathrin’ at the park Gone to see the groundhog, And if he his shadow marks. –They say it is a portent –They say it is a sign, –But I’m one too many mornings… –And a thousand lives behind.
The restless morning’s shattered, The same damn song begins, There’s no escape, I can’t get out And it’s yesterday again. –I’ve tried to kill the rodent, –And myself – uncounted times. –And I’m one too many mornings… –and a thousand lives behind
Now I’ve memorized the future, Just as long as it’s today, Free of consequences, They won’t remember anyway. –The circle stands unbroken, –Past and future, intertwined. –I’m still one too many mornings… –And a thousand lives behind.
Nothing banishes Monday blues like discovering that a decidedly sinister, 100-year-old H. P. Lovecraft poem, entitled “Nemesis,” maps almost perfectly to the 1973 song “Piano Man” by Billy Joel.
If you already know the song, then simply reading the poem below is enough to see that the two really do match. But listening to “Nemesis“ being sung by songwriter and performer Julian Velard as he also plays “Piano Man” is one of the most unsettlingly sublime things the internet has ever produced.
Since the world is in dire need of filk for Garth Nix’s Old Kingdom books.
To be sung to the tune of Green Grow the Rushes-O (the weird Christian singalong song, not to be confused with the pretty Robert Burns song of the same name)
Seven Shine the Shiners-O
I’ll sing you one-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your one-o?
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you two-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your two-o?
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you three-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your three-o?
Three, three, in stone,
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you four-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your four-o?
Four for the Clayr seers,
Three, three, in stone,
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you five-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your five-o?
Five for the Charters, mortar strong,
Four for the Clayr seers,
Three, three, in stone,
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you six-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o,
Who is your six-o?
Six for the bell that binds the dead,
Five for the Charters, mortar strong,
Four for the Clayr seers,
Three, three, in stone,
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you seven-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your seven-o?
Seven Bright, who made the bells,
Six for the bell that binds the dead,
Five for the Charters, mortar strong,
Four for the Clayr seers,
Three, three, in stone,
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you eight-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your eight-o?
Eight is Yrael who hid away,
Seven Bright, who made the bells,
Six for the bell that binds the dead,
Five for the Charters, mortar strong,
Four for the Clayr seers,
Three, three, in stone,
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
I’ll sing you nine-o,
Seven shine the Shiners-o!
Who is your nine-o?
Nine is the dark Orannis,
Eight is Yrael who hid away,
Seven Bright, who made the bells,
Six for the bell that binds the dead,
Five for the Charters, mortar strong,
Four for the Clayr seers,
Three, three, in stone,
Two, two, the Abhorsen,
Who keep the dead down-o,
One the folk who wear the crown,
And evermore shall be so.
Bright light sabers gonna take their toll
Gonna take their toll on me.
Got a whole lot of cargo sitting in the hold
So get those moorings free.
There’s a thousand plastic troopers waitin’ out there
Got a Wookie with less sense than hair.
And I’m just a scoundrel with flair to spare.
“Viva Mos Eisly” by Jeff and Maya Bohnhoff, a song for Han Solo.
Raised on the desert, scoured by the sand
Sand so shifting you can’t make a stand
And the suns sink slowly ‘til they can’t be seen
Another bad season on Tatooine
“Tatooine,” a Luke Skywalker song by Benjamin Newman set to the tune of “Tillman Co.” by Dave Carter.
I started writing this a month or so after The Force Awakens came out and didn’t finish it until now. Whoops. At least I got it done before Episode VII hits theaters?
As always, if anyone with actual musical talent wants to record this, I’d be very, very grateful.
Oh I once was a princess
But my lands are long gone
The planet I came from
Was called Alderaan
I was taught and was raised there
To rule it with pride
With justice and kindness,
The Force on our side
The Empire was unjust
And so I rebelled
But the Empire caught me
Had me tortured and held
Still I told them nothing
And as Alderaan cried
I clung to the knowledge
Of the Force on my side
I learned it much later,
My torturer then
He’d once been my father
Once been a good man
A Jedi of power
Who they’d prophesized
Would bring cosmic balance
The Force on his side
I have a twin brother,
They split us at birth
And hid him away on
A dry barren earth
But his destiny found him
And his childhood died
To his fate he departed
The Force on his side
We took on the empire
And against them we won
I took on a husband
And we had a son
I held him close to me
And as he opened his eyes
I saw a bright future
The Force on our side
But my son he grew older
And grew angry, afraid
The darkness seduced him,
The light he betrayed
Like my father before him
He kills and he tries
To smother all goodness
Bend the Force to his side
I’ve felt my love slaughtered
Struck down by our son
I’ve felt so many dying
A whole system gone
My brother has left me
He stares at the tides
In search of some answer
From the Force on his side
But me, I’m still standing
I’m here fighting still
Though I stand alone now;
Fear I always will
I’ve seen planets crumble
I’ve watched empires fall
And I have to wonder
If there’s a light side at all
