A Grazing Mace

A grazing mace, how sweet the sound, that felled my foe for me
I bashed his head, he struck the ground, and thus came victory
My mace has taught my foes to fear, that mace my fear relieved
How precious did my mace appear, when I my mace received
Through many tourneys wars and fairs, I have already come
My mace has brought me safe thus far, my mace will bring me home
The King has promised good to me, his word my hope secures
I will his shield and weapon be, when he gives me my spurs
And when my mace my foeman nails, that mortal strife shall cease
And we’ll possess within our pale, a life of joy and peace
A grazing mace, how sweet the sound that flattened a wretch like thee!
whose head is flat, that once was round done in by my mace….and me!

SCA fight song (To the tune of Amazing Grace)

The New 52 Song – axonsandsynapses

axonsandsynapses:

To be sung to the tune of The M.T.A. Song

Let me tell you the story of a Batgirl named Steph’nie
And the editors of ol’ DC
They ended her adventures, they cancelled her series
For Cataclysmic Crisis Part 3

Well, did she ever return?
No she never returned
And her fate is still unlearned
Stuck forever in continuity limbo
She’s the hero who never returned

Cassandra was fast and Cassandra was bright
She made Batgirl her very own
But then the Flash exploded the universe (again)
And our beloved Cassandra is gone

‘Cause did she ever return?
No she never returned
And her fate is still unlearned
Stuck forever in continuity limbo
She’s the hero who never returned

Green Arrow – Ollie Queen- he had a son
His name was Connor Hawke
He took his father’s mantle, he did it proud
But the editors, they forgot

And did he ever return?
No he never returned
And his fate is still unlearned
Stuck forever in continuity limbo
He’s the hero who never returned

Well Speedy, he grew up, his sidekick days behind him
And then Mia fought her way on scene
She learned to wield that bow, she owned that title
Made “Team Arrow” truly a team

But did she ever return?
No, she never returned
And her fate is still unlearned
Stuck forever in continuity limbo
She’s the hero who never returned

Now Wally West, he was the Flash’s sidekick
Was in the Titans from day number one
Loved as a kid, loved more as a hero
But they decided his days were done

‘Cause did he ever return?
No he never returned
And his fate is still unlearned
Stuck forever in continuity limbo
He’s the hero who never returned

Donna Troy, well her past is tricky
And on her story nobody agrees
But she still shone bright as the first Girl Wonder
But it wasn’t enough for ol’ DC

And she never returned
No she never returned
Her fate is still unlearned
Stuck forever in continuity limbo
She’s the hero who never returned

Oh no they never returned
No they never returned
And their fate is still unlearned
Stuck forever in continuity limbo
They’re the heroes that never returned

Note: Yes, I’m aware that Steph is currently making her reappearance in Batman Eternal. She was just the easiest character to begin with.
Also, I’m aware that I’m missing characters. Feel free to add verses if you so desire.

You Bash the Balrog – Lee Gold

Lyrics by Lee Gold, to the tune of “Waltzing Matilda.”  Sing it with friends as a fun party game.

Once a jolly Cleric, and a magic-using Elf,
And a mighty Dwarf with a sword plus three
Left their native village – out to get their share of pelf.
You bash the Balrog, while I climb the tree.

First they met a Goblin – with a fire-breathing Hound.
They bashed and they smashed and they scragged them with glee.
Afterwards they searched them – and a Magic Potion found.
You bash the Balrog, while I climb the tree.

The low Wisdom Swordsman picked it up and drank it down,
Changed to a Wolf immediately.
No one could Dispell it, so they headed back to town.
You bash the Balrog, while I climb the tree.

Then a loud voice bellowed, “Who has slain the Goblin King?”
Round turned our heroes; what did they see?
Swooping down upon them was a Balrog on the wing.
You bash the Balrog, while I climb the tree.

“Help,” screamed the Cleric; “Ditto,” yelled the Elven Mage.
The Wolf whimpered low – and he tried to flee.
The Balrog fell upon them, and his flames began to rage;
You bash the Balrog, while I climb the tree.

They ran through the forest, looking for a place to hide,
Pursued by the Balrog, so fierce to see.
“Wait,” cried the Elf Mage; “I have got a plan,” he lied.
“You bash the Balrog, while I climb the tree.”

Once a mighty Balrog slew a Cleric and an Elf
And a smallish Wolf who had teeth plus three,
Skinned them and tanned their hides…and kept them on a closet shelf.
You bash the Balrog, while I climb the tree.