I Ain’t A Martian Anymore – Araxie Haldane

scribefindegil:

animatedamerican:

What was the very first filk song you wrote about?

scribefindegil:

oooh! I was writing songs since I was very small and they were all about fantasy things (exception: the time my fourth-grade class wrote and performed a musical about whales in which I played a marine biologist/detective) because everything in my life was about fantasy things.

But the first actual filk I wrote was a collab with one of my best friends from college. It was written to the tune of “I Ain’t Marching Anymore” and was called “I Ain’t A Martian Anymore.” I should see if I can dig up the words.

I think that she came up with the title, and then I suggested the line “Take a look at what we’ve done with a laser-powered gun,” and then we wrote verses back and forth to each other over the summer and on each other’s whiteboards when we got back to school. It was a very fun process!

(bonus minor collaborators were my dad for insisting I find a way to rhyme “vortex” with “cerebral cortex” and @thebastardofgloucester for knowing board games they play in the Star Wars universe)

… i have a MIGHTY NEED  to see these lyrics

Okay, here we are. Turns out I still have the whole thing memorized even though I need to go look up that Star Wars board game every time.

I Ain’t A Martian Anymore

You’ve heard of those Ferengi with their acquisition rules
Their plotting and their scheming and their lore
They take all that they need, they have no law but greed
But I ain’t a Martian anymore!
And you’ve doubtless met those green men in their funny little ships
Drawing circles in your fields of corn
Every day is an occasion for an alien invasion
But I ain’t a Martian anymore!

For it’s red planet’s children that always go to war
Red planet’s children who fall
Take a look at what we’ve done with a laser-powered gun
And tell me was it worth it all?

I’ve had my share of combat now in every part of life
In games of dejarik as well as war
If a wookie has to win it then why bother to begin it?
And I ain’t a Martian anymore!
And I must have wiped the Daleks out at least a hundred times
But they keep on resurrecting by the score
When they next return I’m slated to be first exterminated
But I ain’t a Martian anymore!

For it’s red planet’s children that always go to war
Red planet’s children who fall
Take a look at what we’ve done with a laser-powered gun
And tell me was it worth it all?

I may have been a Martian but I’m sick of all this strife
I’m sick of spilling alien guts and gore
I’ll wind up like a Reaver smashing heads in with a cleaver
If I stay a Martian anymore!
Now the Cybermen are screaming that the universe is theirs
The Vogons threaten poetry galore
Let them toss me in a vortx, mess with my cerebral cortex
But I ain’t a Martian anymore!
No I ain’t a Martian anymore!

For it’s red planet’s children that always go to war
Red planet’s children who fall
Take a look at what we’ve done with a laser-powered gun
And tell me was it worth it all?

Pure of Heart – Araxie Haldane

scribefindegil:

It was only a matter of time before I wrote a filk inspired by The Last Mabelcorn. Don’t let the unicorns get you down.

Lyrics:

The unicorn smiled when she saw you approaching her fountain
“Just one little test” she demanded and shot you a grin
“Just prove that your heart is as pure as the dew on the snowdrops
You’ll foul my glade if you’re wicked and tainted with sin.”

CHORUS:
Don’t fall for the lies of those cruel unicorns
You’ve been messy and mortal since the day you were born
If you try to be perfect it’s just gonna tear you apart.
They want you to break yourself down till you shatter
They’ll say that you’re selfish for knowing you matter
So be brave and tenacious and loving and joyful and smart
But forget pure of heart.

“My lady,” you said, “I can’t claim that my spirit is blameless,
But I try to do good and to help in the ways I know how
My heart’s filled with love for myself and the people around me
And I’ll strive to do more and be better and stronger, I vow!”

CHORUS

The unicorn scoffed and she drew back her head with a shudder.
“I knew it! You arrogant mortals have never been pure!
Perhaps if you’re humble enough you may gain some forgiveness
But you’ll never be perfect. You’re sullied, and I have no cure!”

CHORUS

“Well, what have you done then?” you said as you stood up and faced her
“Just sit in this glade telling people the things they can’t do.
There isn’t a deed or a person who’s ever been perfect
And I may not be pure but I’ve damn well done more good than you!”

CHORUS

If you’re careful you’ll notice that unicorns live all around us
You can tell by the smugly superior look in their eyes.
They’ll enumerate each of your flaws with distain in their voices.
They’ll all tell you you have to be perfect; they’ll all tell you lies!

Don’t fall for the lies of those cruel unicorns
We’ve been messy and mortal since the day we were born
If we try to be perfect it’s just gonna tear us apart.
I won’t let the world break me down till I shatter
I’d rather be selfish than think I don’t matter!
I’m brave and tenacious and loving and joyful and smart
But I’m not pure of heart.

The Ballad of Raven’s Roost – Araxie Haldane

scribefindegil:

In-universe ballad about the rebellion of Raven’s Roost. Companion piece for my fanfic “The Ballad of Raven’s Roost,” available here on tumblr and here on ao3.

(Download from Bandcamp)

Tune: Rosin the Bow (traditional)
Lyrics (below the cut): scribefindegil/Araxie Haldane

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Make This Timeline Brighter (Demo) – Araxie Haldane

scribefindegil:

A rough demo of the hope song I’ve been trying to write since November 8th.

Lyrics:

So here we are. It’s come to this.
The darkest timeline’s where we’re living.
I know it’s hard to carry on
And take the world that we’ve been given.

But we’re still here. And we’re still fighting
With our hands, our words, our hearts
In little ways, through darkened days.
This is where the future starts.

So make this timeline brighter.
Make this timeline brighter.
Make this timeline brighter.
From today.

I know that I can’t save the world
But I will save the things I can.
In start and fits, the timeline splits
Every time we take a stand.

We make this timeline brighter.
Make this timeline brighter.
Make this timeline brighter.
From today.

So help the ones who need your helping
Lend your voices to their song
And small and slow the world starts changing
Though the work is hard and long

We’ll make this timeline brighter.
Make this timeline brighter.
Make this timeline brighter.
From today.

You’re a Star – Araxie Haldane

scribefindegil:

Here’s my piece for Day 7 of The Power Of Mabel Week! It’s a filk (lyrics under the cut)! Thank you so much to everyone else who contributed and made this week such a success (and if you haven’t finished something that’s okay–Mabel Week may officially be over today, but it lives on in my heart and I’d love to see more things that people create)

Much love to all of you and to our beautiful star child.

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Handyman (at the end of the world) – Araxie Haldane

scribefindegil:

“I guess there’s some folk songs about me now?”
-Soos Ramirez, Weirdmageddon Part 1

Well, now there’s at least one. An ode to everyone’s favorite apocalyptic handyman.

Lyrics under the cut:

Keep reading

The Last Centurion’s Song – Will Sturman

I got left alone in a recording studio last week, so I thought I’d do a recording of the Doctor Who song thebastardofgloucester and scribefindegil wrote, to the tune of Leslie Fish’s “Roman Centurion’s Song.”  Because it’s great and I want people to hear it.

Lyrics and a link to the original song here