Yeah, Filk!

For space is wide and good friends are too few



Pure of Heart – Araxie Haldane


It was only a matter of time before I wrote a filk inspired by The Last Mabelcorn. Don’t let the unicorns get you down.


The unicorn smiled when she saw you approaching her fountain
“Just one little test” she demanded and shot you a grin
“Just prove that your heart is as pure as the dew on the snowdrops
You’ll foul my glade if you’re wicked and tainted with sin.”

Don’t fall for the lies of those cruel unicorns
You’ve been messy and mortal since the day you were born
If you try to be perfect it’s just gonna tear you apart.
They want you to break yourself down till you shatter
They’ll say that you’re selfish for knowing you matter
So be brave and tenacious and loving and joyful and smart
But forget pure of heart.

“My lady,” you said, “I can’t claim that my spirit is blameless,
But I try to do good and to help in the ways I know how
My heart’s filled with love for myself and the people around me
And I’ll strive to do more and be better and stronger, I vow!”


The unicorn scoffed and she drew back her head with a shudder.
“I knew it! You arrogant mortals have never been pure!
Perhaps if you’re humble enough you may gain some forgiveness
But you’ll never be perfect. You’re sullied, and I have no cure!”


“Well, what have you done then?” you said as you stood up and faced her
“Just sit in this glade telling people the things they can’t do.
There isn’t a deed or a person who’s ever been perfect
And I may not be pure but I’ve damn well done more good than you!”


If you’re careful you’ll notice that unicorns live all around us
You can tell by the smugly superior look in their eyes.
They’ll enumerate each of your flaws with distain in their voices.
They’ll all tell you you have to be perfect; they’ll all tell you lies!

Don’t fall for the lies of those cruel unicorns
We’ve been messy and mortal since the day we were born
If we try to be perfect it’s just gonna tear us apart.
I won’t let the world break me down till I shatter
I’d rather be selfish than think I don’t matter!
I’m brave and tenacious and loving and joyful and smart
But I’m not pure of heart.

The Lady – Urban Tapestry


But the Lady is faithful, she rides the bright sea
Her bowing is graceful, full of dignity
She speeds ‘cross the water, the wind at her back
And the crew hopes she’ll carry them home


“The Lady,” by Urban Tapestry (Debbie Ridpath Ohi, Allison Durno, and Jodi Krangle)  plus Tom Jeffers on bass, Dave Clement on lead guitar, and Kylea Fulton on pennywhistle

An immigration song…about vampires.

Close your eyes – Heather Alexander


Close your eyes – Heather Alexander

Close your eyes, forget your every care,
Picture faerie castles in the air
Magic is in store for you,
You may find your dreams come true,
When you wake your wishes may be there

Ballade of the Blue Rose – Clarsa McElhaney

"I know the secret longings hidden deep within the songs you sing,

     "and though I've never loved I must now for the sake of the rising Spring.

"I will fulfill your secret dream from now until the next sunrise

     "if you'll consent to let me have, the fire, from your eyes."

If there’s one thing filkers can’t seem to get enough of, besides puns, it’s weird and ominous songs about musicians.  “Ballade of the Blue Rose,” by Coral de Chauncey (Wendy Murphy) and Brad of Cambria (Brad Banyan), sung by Clarsa McElhaney.  Lyrics and chords available here.

via @rocket-song-acoustic: Kipling and 12-string guitar.  For some reason I can’t play this one without thinking of Seanan’s Toby Daye series.

“The Fairies’ Siege,” words by Rudyard Kipling, music and performance by Mark Horning
The Fairies Siege

Narnia – Choirfly


Hey so @choirfly had the best time performing at @housingworksbookstore and we’re happy to share this Chronicles of Narnia parody of Toto’s “Africa” with you! Please subscribe & share if you most likely wouldn’t sell out your sibling for a piece of Turkish delight.


Filksong Genealogy: Bashing the Balrog

(Series: Filksong Genealogy)

Firstly, above: Leslie Fish’s setting of Rudyard Kipling’s poem “Dane-Geld,” about the dubious wisdom of paying tribute to avoid being conquered by a neighboring country with less portable wealth but better armies.

Secondly, as previously seen on this blog, a classic filksong to the tune of “Waltzing Matilda”: Lee Gold’s “You Bash the Balrog,” a cheerful little ditty about an ill-fated set of D&D adventurers.  (If you’ve never heard “Waltzing Matilda,” have a listen here and maybe check out the wikipedia page.)

And finally, below: Bob Kanefsky’s synthesis “Bashing the Balrog,” performed by Leslie Fish.

Filksong Genealogy: Save Yourselves!

(Series: Filksong Genealogy)

Above we have Seanan McGuire’s “Wicked Girls” (lyrics), performed in concert by the author along with Michelle “Vixy” Dockrey and Tony Fabris, S.J. “Sooj” Tucker, and Amy McNally.

And below, we have Bob Kanefksy’s truly wicked parody, “Save Yourselves!” (lyrics), performed in circle by Vixy and Tony.  Yes, that’s Seanan nearby in the circle, and yes, she’s hearing it for the first time.

Filksong Genealogy: December of Cambreadth


Use your hooves and use your head
Don’t let down the Man in Red 

“March of Cambreadth” (lyrics), by Heather Alexander, is a classic battle song about killing as many people as possible.  “December of Cambreadth” (lyrics), a parody by Bob Kanefsky, is…also about maximization of output, but the similarities end there.  Except that the language is, somehow, equally vicious.

(Series: Filksong Genealogy)

Cheshire Kitten (We’re All Mad Here) – S.J. Tucker


We’re all mad here, and it’s okay

The Ballad of Raven’s Roost – Araxie Haldane


In-universe ballad about the rebellion of Raven’s Roost. Companion piece for my fanfic “The Ballad of Raven’s Roost,” available here on tumblr and here on ao3.

(Download from Bandcamp)

Tune: Rosin the Bow (traditional)
Lyrics (below the cut): scribefindegil/Araxie Haldane

Keep reading

We used to sail to R’lyeh; that’s where we put ashore
We used to sail to R’lyeh; we did but we don’t anymore
A lass there wanted an Elder Thing; we had some of those on board
Cthulu, she wanted? A Deep One she got!
That’s why we don’t sail there no more…

Check out the Misbehavin’ Maidens on Bandcamp

Support the Misbehavin’ Maidens’ 2nd album Kickstarter through Feb. 2, 2017

Don’t Sail There No More

Go Forth By Night – Ben Newman

Step out your door
When darkness falls
Don’t ask what for
Don’t ask who calls

“Go Forth By Night” by Ben Newman, downloaded from his website, with lyrics and chords available here.  A little bit eerie, in the most inspiring way possible.

Naming – Beth Kinderman and the Player Characters

I am the flame that sparks the ember
I am the thunder in the deep
I am a broken tree upon a far hill
a song to make minstrels weep

“Naming,” by Beth Kinderman and the Player Characters, about Kvothe, from Patrick Rothfuss’ trilogy The Kingkiller Chronicle

Across the Water – Beth Kinderman & the Player Characters

so I’ll see you across the water
still the one & still my daughter
still you grow
& your list is getting shorter
& it’s you who gave the order for you know
all men must die

“Across the Water,” a song for Arya Stark by Beth Kinderman & the Player Characters.  I got to hear this live last year at a hotel room party (the way it’s meant to be heard), and let me tell you, the outro is a very good time if you’ve got a receptive audience.

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