Have you seen the ne’er-to-do, locked up in ‘Ark Avenue’,
On that famous thoroughfare, with some toxin in the air,
High hats and Arrow collars, green spats and lots of dollars,
Spending every dime, on a wonderful crime!If you’re blue and you don’t know where to go to,
Why don’t you go where chaos sits,
Gotham on the fritz!Femme fatales who wear a day coat, two-faced men,
Or leather bound coats, perfect fits,
Gotham on the fritz!Dressed up like a winged flying sleuther,
Trying hard to look like Ol’ Lex Luthor (super duper),
Come let’s mix where Cobblepots walk with their sticks,
Or umbrellas in their mitts.
Gotham on the fritz!Kitty cats all wear a diamond choker,
Harley walking with the man who broke her (what a joker),
You’ll declare it’s simply insane to be there,
And cower as they battle wits,
Gotham on the fritz!(I was bored. This happened. Deal with it.)